From psychosis to: Beth's story
21/02/2022
Beth, 27, lives in the Midlands in supported accommodation. Their psychosis experience began at age 19 and Early Intervention in Psychosis Services (EIP) helped them get “back on track”. Having previously worked in a GP surgery, they are currently on the hunt for a new job. Beth is excited for the future and looking forward to owning their own home.
Before I was diagnosed with psychosis, I used to work in a GP surgery. When I was 19, work started to get a little bit strange. I started hearing voices in my head, that began to commentate on the things I was doing. I became convinced that my boss was poisoning the water. We had a tank of liquid nitrogen that was worrying me. I knew it was going to blow up. It felt inevitable.
I did the natural thing. I told my colleagues about my boss’s intentions. I remember them all explaining that she wasn’t doing anything to the water. But I was adamant that she was trying to kill me. Looking back on it, I know that wasn’t the case. But it felt so real at the time.
I went to my GP to have cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) after having some issues with my eating. After two sessions, one of the nurses quickly rang the GP and explained that she thought I was psychotic.
I got sent urgently to mental health services, and I remember feeling quite confused. In my first assessment, I was saying ‘No, everything is fine’. But then I was put on anti-psychotics and I realised very quickly that everything hadn’t been fine.
Psychosis can be a really lonely thing to experience. In comparison to depression and anxiety, it seems like there’s no information out there about it. People often think that everyone who is psychotic is evil. But really, we’re more likely to be victims.
Although it didn’t feel like it at the time, there were people that wanted to help.